I find myself feeling a little let down today. I had a good plan laid out this morning and I accomplished everything I set out to do. I was sure that once I sat down and worked on my budget and financials that all would feel right with the world. Well, all does not feel right with the world. I discovered (while creating my budget) I had neglected certain verbal agreements. Regardless of my intent or lack of intent I had failed to meet an obligation. Therein lay the feelings of let down. I've let myself down and another and that works my nerve. How do I make this right? I feel confined by certain obligations made to, shall I say, "legal parties". And not so confined by certain verbal obligations that I've made. I have always wanted to keep to my word on things I say I'm going to do. But I discriminate between those obligations that have legal ramifications and those that have personal ramifications. I know that is wrong and I don't know how to find a balance between satisfying each of these obligations.
I do not like the feeling of taking advantage of a situation to satisfy my needs alone. That is selfish and unfair to another person involved. This is an opportunity to learn how to make this right. I am at a loss; however, as to how to do so. So for now, for the sake of my sanity I shall put this dilemma to rest. I will revisit it once I have had time to reflect and get feedback by those opinions that I respect. I know I'm not a bad person but I know I can be a better person. The answer is out there somewhere and I will find it.
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